In a previous post, I mentioned I had never been to Walmart. Sure, I’ve seen the various “People of Walmart” posts, showing some of the more colorful customers to grace the aisles.
But I had never been to one.
So this weekend, God willing, I will lose my Walmart virginity. I am torn between dressing very sedate and boring, or saying “What the hell” and diving in my storage closet for something outrageous to see if I join the ranks of the Walmart cult.
So into the storage closet I go. First, the wig boxes: do I want to be blond, brunette, red head, black flapper bob, or dreadlocks? I rip open boxes, mostly of old Halloween costumes; sexy nun, bloody nurse, French maid, prairie dresses and old evening gowns. What to do – old evening gown with sneakers and dread locks? Or hot pants, fishnet stockings, orthopedic shoes, and a red wig?
(Rest assured that I will be well armed with anti-bacterial wipes, hand sanitizer, and a mask used by Dustin Hoffman in that epidemic movie, not to mention the biggest sunglasses since Jackie O.)
I’ll report back. Wish me luck!