Surviving A Boor

  Have you ever known someone who no matter what you do, they’ve done it, too…many times, in various locations, won the prize, met the band, had the celebrity chef cook just for them? Lucia and I find ourselves rolling our eyes so hard at people like this.
You know what I mean. If you saw Cats on Broadway, they were there opening night. If you were fortunate enough to see Springsteen at MSG, they went to all 5 shows. Burning Man? Been there, done that. Mention you’re going to Eric Ripert’s restaurant, they’ve been there, and he came out and sat at their table to have a drink. Score tickets for The Masters, and they were there the first time Tiger won. Tell them you’re going to the Super Bowl (Lucia dated a player; that’s another story) and mention it, they’ve been to several and their preferred team always won. At first you nod politely, and go “Oh, that’s great.” Until it isn’t great – it’s boring, tiresome, and you begin to highly doubt they did it at all. I know I sound like a bitch, but even with my genteel upbringing, I recognize bullshit when I smell it.
We knew someone very casually who was like this, and after a while began avoiding him because of his continuous “Oh, I did that. And in Austria!” Not only is it annoying, it borders on rude, as it sucks the joy out of your experience, because according to them, they did it bigger and better than you. Every single time.
So if you are ever in the presence of one of these odious creatures, do what we do now: Pics or it didn’t happen.

About D'arcy

D'arcy grew up on an estate in upstate New York, surrounded by staff, with mostly absentee parents. Left to her own devices, she shunned school, read voraciously, and collected animals, first-edition volumes of her favorite books, and occasionally men. D'arcy recently moved out of her apartment on the UES of NYC with her cavachon pup, Aramis, and is currently living at her late parents estate while deciding on where to put down roots. The best way to get on her good side is to have a sense of humor, not take yourself too seriously, and be kind in general. Irritate her, and you'll be greeted with a laser look and a tongue lashing for the ages, and not the good kind.

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